Ok. To follow up on Sam's post below.
We did, in fact, have a rocking time Tuesday night. It has been far too long since I have been to see a live concert, my how times have changed.
Here are some of my observations.
1. I actually had to purchase this ticket. These weren't compted. Ahh those were the days when concert tickets were just a part of the job perks....
2. I had no backstage access. Back to #1.
3. There were far more grey hairs in the crowd than black. Definitely, not a mohawk in sight!
4. I didn't rush the stage.... I actually stayed in my seat. Though I did dance. First time I saw Simple Minds.... I had front row seats...
5. Cell phones have replaced lighters when the lights go out.
6. No one smoked. Anything.
7. There were no beach balls bouncing around before the concert. People just sat and read the free newspaper given out at the door. Not "High Times" or "NME", but, the Corrierre della Sera, the NY Times of Italy.
8. No security at the door. Seemed like everyone brought their camera but me! What was I thinking?
Overall. It was a very civil experience. Though I must admit, it was strange to hear Jim Kerr speak Italian with a Scottish accent. Sharon, eat your heart out. The band rocked and sounded very good. They sang all the hits, plus a few surprises. The audience was enthusiastic. There was even a guy in a full scottish get up, kilt and all, waving the Saltire - St. Andrew's Cross! It was odd to hear New Gold "Drim" shouted instead of Dream. Ahh those Italian accents. But, the crowd knew all the songs, new and old. I fit right in, these were my people!
By the time the night ended, I was back in touch with my old groupie self. Life was great. Now where are they playing next? I'm ready to rock and roll.
And I will let you in on a little secret... Sam sang and danced the whole night too. Shhh. Don't tell anyone.
So in the words of Jim Kerr.
Don't you forget about me......
Krista
Thursday, March 23, 2006
Wednesday, March 22, 2006
La la la la la la la la la la la
And so sang Jim Kerr et al last night.
Not to be outdone by Ed and Ieva in the "ageing rocker most likely to have a hip replacement" contest, Krista and I went to Verona (note to aspiring tourists: forget the balcony from Romeo and Juliet...it's a tourist trap) last night to see Simple Minds.
Ironically enough, we had similar seats to Ed and Ieva in that they were great, close to the stage and off to the side...albeit in different countries, arenas, etc.
So we danced, sang along and generally had a great time. To be honest though, the crowd reflected the times, i.e. no bouncing beach balls, no whiff of the good lord's herb, no nothing....in fact, they were handing out complimentary newspapers at the door!
So, as Someone, Somewhere, in Summertime once said, as they went down to the Waterfront to reflect on a New Gold Dream...time to go and read the Book of Brilliant Things.
Saturday, March 11, 2006
A Lazy Saturday Afternoon....
It has been a while since I posted a photo of Gucci. Today you get a bonus, Sam and Gucci!
With Anna banana off learning how to snowboard - report just in, Anna said her bum is sore because she kept falling and it is very hard to do, skiing is much easier. And, Sarah off at school. This morning Sam and I found ourselves alone with glorious weather. Though Sam's leg is badly bruised his summoned up his Finnish Sisu and dragged me out for a morning hike in the hills of Chiavari finished off with a delicious cappuccino. On the way home we strolled through the market, did some shopping for lunch, and got home just in time for Sarah. A truly busy morning. After lunch the Sarah and Vi went off to play and Sam and I retired to the couch. Who did the miserable cat choose to snuggle with? Surely not the one who feeds and cleans up after her!
Sarah just left for an other pajama party at Virginia's, this time their new classmate Julia will be joining them. Can you picture 3 screaming boy crazy almost 12 year olds? I can and so can Virginia's mom, Cristina, she has a babysitter to stay with them, she is going out! Sam is busy working doing his magic with yacht drawings. Me? I am blogging again.
Sam and I once again find ourselves alone on a Saturday night. How lucky is that? We are on our way to meet up with Mark and Cristina who have made reservations for dinner this evening for the four of us at an African Restaurant in Genoa. Should be interesting. I have never had African cuisine before, but a continent with so many countries and so many peoples with various customs and cultures must have some excellent food. Though when one thinks of Africa and food, only famine comes to mind. I will let you know tomorrow how African food rates.
A dopo!
Krista
With Anna banana off learning how to snowboard - report just in, Anna said her bum is sore because she kept falling and it is very hard to do, skiing is much easier. And, Sarah off at school. This morning Sam and I found ourselves alone with glorious weather. Though Sam's leg is badly bruised his summoned up his Finnish Sisu and dragged me out for a morning hike in the hills of Chiavari finished off with a delicious cappuccino. On the way home we strolled through the market, did some shopping for lunch, and got home just in time for Sarah. A truly busy morning. After lunch the Sarah and Vi went off to play and Sam and I retired to the couch. Who did the miserable cat choose to snuggle with? Surely not the one who feeds and cleans up after her!
Sarah just left for an other pajama party at Virginia's, this time their new classmate Julia will be joining them. Can you picture 3 screaming boy crazy almost 12 year olds? I can and so can Virginia's mom, Cristina, she has a babysitter to stay with them, she is going out! Sam is busy working doing his magic with yacht drawings. Me? I am blogging again.
Sam and I once again find ourselves alone on a Saturday night. How lucky is that? We are on our way to meet up with Mark and Cristina who have made reservations for dinner this evening for the four of us at an African Restaurant in Genoa. Should be interesting. I have never had African cuisine before, but a continent with so many countries and so many peoples with various customs and cultures must have some excellent food. Though when one thinks of Africa and food, only famine comes to mind. I will let you know tomorrow how African food rates.
A dopo!
Krista
Friday, March 10, 2006
Why we live in Chiavari
Life in Italy, at the best of times, can be a challenge, and that is not including the challenge of speaking the language. At it's worst, like this morning with Sam and his bike, life can be a horror and you wonder why you even bother living here at all. At times like these you need to find what it is that sustains you through the rough patches in life, no matter where you are. Today Sam and I needed to remind ourselves of just why it is we love living in Chiavari.
This evening, Sam and I met Ian down on the passagiata for a little stroll and apperitivo. The sunset was glorious, the air, dare I say, had a touch of spring in it, and all seemed right with the world. Isn't this photo proof positive of how beautiful Chiavari can be? Yes, Sam refused to go to the hospital, against my better judgement, in his opinion if he can walk, he must be fine. The apperitivo we had was divine and when we went to pay the bill, we ended up having a long discussion with the bar owner over the quality of the wine, a Nero D'Avola, and learned that Sam and I are well known in his bar for ordering our Mojitos senza zuccero, in other words, without sugar. He can't get his head around that. Oh well, as he said, to each his own. As we left, we felt a part of something... life in Chiavari, and isn't that what life is all about? Feeling like you belong and people know your name? Hey, they made a TV series about that!
Cheers!
Krista
Off to cook dinner for the family, or that is, Sam and Sarah....
This evening, Sam and I met Ian down on the passagiata for a little stroll and apperitivo. The sunset was glorious, the air, dare I say, had a touch of spring in it, and all seemed right with the world. Isn't this photo proof positive of how beautiful Chiavari can be? Yes, Sam refused to go to the hospital, against my better judgement, in his opinion if he can walk, he must be fine. The apperitivo we had was divine and when we went to pay the bill, we ended up having a long discussion with the bar owner over the quality of the wine, a Nero D'Avola, and learned that Sam and I are well known in his bar for ordering our Mojitos senza zuccero, in other words, without sugar. He can't get his head around that. Oh well, as he said, to each his own. As we left, we felt a part of something... life in Chiavari, and isn't that what life is all about? Feeling like you belong and people know your name? Hey, they made a TV series about that!
Cheers!
Krista
Off to cook dinner for the family, or that is, Sam and Sarah....
Why everyone should wear a bike helmet!
This morning while I was stretching mind and body at my twice a week Pilates class, Sam hit the road on his mountain bike. As he was coming back to Chiavari alone on the road he was hit from behind by a car. Though Sam was way to the right, meaning out of the way of traffic, this driver clipped the handle bars of the bike and Sam literally hit the pavement - flying over the car and in to the middle of the road. Thank god that there was not another car behind the driver or one coming the opposite direction. Do you think the driver stopped? Not a chance, he slowed down and then, just took off. Meanwhile Sam was dazed and splayed out in the middle of the street. Luckily, Sam was able to get up and back on his bike, albeit a bit stunned. Sam was injured, but not enough to go the hospital. At least according to him. I have been trying to get him there all day.
Point of all this....
Wear your helmet when riding your bike - At all times! You never know what might happen. Sam did land on his head today, but his flash yellow helmet saved him from a serious head injury.
Though there are bad drivers around the world, I am sorry, some of the worst happen to live in Italy. I apologize to my Italian friends... but it is true.
Here is a little take on how Americans view driving in Italy...
Yes, there are some. People who say Italians do not know how to drive are measuring them by the wrong yardstick. They have a very controlled abandon to their driving. I will comment on eight statements that are common among those Americans who think Italians are crazy drivers.
1) 'I wish they would not get so close.' Italians drivers are much more comfortable driving much closer than is typical in America. 'An inch is as good as a mile' is easily translated into 'A centimeter is as good as a kilometer,' and they think nothing of getting that close. If you know to expect this and do not panic, you will be fine.
2) 'They keep cutting me off.' When driving in Italy, your responsibility is to those in front of you and those to your side. They rarely use their rear-view mirror. If there is an opening in front of you, it is your obligation to fill it, or someone will fill it for you. (See rule 1 for how little distance in front of you is necessary for this to happen.) You learned in driver's ed. that you should have one car length for every 10 m.p.h.. This will never happen in Italy except on the most deserted roads.
3) 'They almost ran me over.' To which the Italian might respond, "I didn't, did I?" When you, as a driver, encounter pedestrians, they are to walk as straight as possible and you are to avoid them (see rule 1). I call this 'the pigeon in the piazza' effect. Try walking or even running through a flock of pigeons. The pigeons are everywhere and they are close, but they never hit you unless you stop quickly. This is exactly opposite of, for example, New York cabbies, who drive absolutely straight and the pedestrian has the responsibility to avoid the cab.
4) 'They ignore stop signs and traffic lights.' This is a slowly fading myth. As less and less traffic is allowed in the center of the cities (don't even think of driving in Florence: you cannot get closer than a mile from anything historic by car), the Italians are obeying traffic signals more. It is clear why; streets are wider outside of the center, traffic is increased, and only major intersections have lights. No one would zip through an intersection that has a lot of traffic going through it. You may see traffic violations more often than in America, but the last time I was there, I did not see anyone driving in the bus lanes or driving through a red light through traffic. However, it is foolhardy to go through an uncontrolled, blind intersection quickly without at least a look or a small toot on the horn.
5) 'They have itty bitty cars.' Another slowly fading myth. The subcompact is the norm, but you will have to look hard these days to see what I was told was the 'typical Italian car', a 500 cc Fiat. As Italy has gotten more affluent, cars have been getting bigger, and you will be hard pressed to rent a car with less than 750 cc's. The 750 cc Fiat Panda that I drove could make it up to 85 m.p.h. on a straight flat road with three people and luggage. It had trouble up mountains, and it had a bit of sway in the curves, but it was quite serviceable.
6) 'There is no place to park.' This is not a myth. However, it is not as bad as you would think. There are usually large parking areas outside of the center of cities. And within cities, what makes for an acceptable parking place may be called a sidewalk in America. I have been told that the typical evolution of a parking space in Italy goes as follows.
"People are walking in the middle of the street because cars are parked directly next to buildings.
A sidewalk is made.
The cars park on the sidewalk.
A government employee is paid to collect a parking fee from those on the sidewalk.
Go to point #1. "
Still, because of parking and driving restrictions in the Triad, if time does not permit you to visit the smaller cities, towns and the countryside, I would suggest you forgo a car and stick to the train.
7) 'They do the strangest things on the highway.' What we consider strange is a consequence of the wider variety of vehicle powers, and what constitutes courtesy while passing. Some smaller vehicles that would never be allowed on American Interstates are found on the Autostrade at restricted speeds (80 or even 60 km/h; approx. 50 and 38 m.p.h., respectively). For most cars on most of the Autostrade, the speed limit is 100 km/h (61 m.p.h.). This is as widely ignored as our speed limits are. Above what we would consider 'reasonable speeding', Mercedes, BMW's and Alfa Romeo's go as fast as their engines will allow. To deal with this there is a four-step protocol for passing and being passed.
If being passed, you should put the right set of tires on the shoulder, if at all practical. This makes two lanes three. I have been able to pass on two lane roads in Italy with traffic approaching because the approaching car put their right wheel on the shoulder, too. This action is not for the unfamiliar or the faint of heart.
If you are passing, but intend to maintain speed, and return to the right (most of us), you should leave your left turn signal on until you are ready to return to the right when you change to your right turn signal.
If you are traveling in the left lane, and intend to go as fast as your car allows, do not put on your turn signal.
If you are in the left lane, approaching someone from behind who is going slower and you have no turn signal on, flash your lights at them. It is their responsibility to get out of your way. If you are on the receiving end of one of these 'light horns', act quickly or you will get run over. This is particularly frightening when going through a tunnel on a bright day, you cannot see the lines on the road well and someone comes up from behind.
8) 'I would just get lost.' You are right, but this should not overly upset you. You should not keep so tight a schedule that getting lost will harm you too much. Violent crime in Italy is very low, so, as opposed to America, being lost in a city is not a threat to life or limb. Besides, being lost can be scheduled in. A good estimate is that getting lost the first time will cost you about 20 minutes and any more after that will cost about 15 minutes. The more important time is, the more 'losts' you schedule in. Hotel reservations should have a 'three lost' cushion (50 minutes). Getting to a museum when it first opens needs only a 'one lost' cushion (20 minutes). So what if you get there early? Find a gelateria and have a two scoop lemon ice cream, or take a chair and have a Campari and soda or just sit in the piazza and watch children chase pigeons.
Point of all this....
Wear your helmet when riding your bike - At all times! You never know what might happen. Sam did land on his head today, but his flash yellow helmet saved him from a serious head injury.
Though there are bad drivers around the world, I am sorry, some of the worst happen to live in Italy. I apologize to my Italian friends... but it is true.
Here is a little take on how Americans view driving in Italy...
Yes, there are some. People who say Italians do not know how to drive are measuring them by the wrong yardstick. They have a very controlled abandon to their driving. I will comment on eight statements that are common among those Americans who think Italians are crazy drivers.
1) 'I wish they would not get so close.' Italians drivers are much more comfortable driving much closer than is typical in America. 'An inch is as good as a mile' is easily translated into 'A centimeter is as good as a kilometer,' and they think nothing of getting that close. If you know to expect this and do not panic, you will be fine.
2) 'They keep cutting me off.' When driving in Italy, your responsibility is to those in front of you and those to your side. They rarely use their rear-view mirror. If there is an opening in front of you, it is your obligation to fill it, or someone will fill it for you. (See rule 1 for how little distance in front of you is necessary for this to happen.) You learned in driver's ed. that you should have one car length for every 10 m.p.h.. This will never happen in Italy except on the most deserted roads.
3) 'They almost ran me over.' To which the Italian might respond, "I didn't, did I?" When you, as a driver, encounter pedestrians, they are to walk as straight as possible and you are to avoid them (see rule 1). I call this 'the pigeon in the piazza' effect. Try walking or even running through a flock of pigeons. The pigeons are everywhere and they are close, but they never hit you unless you stop quickly. This is exactly opposite of, for example, New York cabbies, who drive absolutely straight and the pedestrian has the responsibility to avoid the cab.
4) 'They ignore stop signs and traffic lights.' This is a slowly fading myth. As less and less traffic is allowed in the center of the cities (don't even think of driving in Florence: you cannot get closer than a mile from anything historic by car), the Italians are obeying traffic signals more. It is clear why; streets are wider outside of the center, traffic is increased, and only major intersections have lights. No one would zip through an intersection that has a lot of traffic going through it. You may see traffic violations more often than in America, but the last time I was there, I did not see anyone driving in the bus lanes or driving through a red light through traffic. However, it is foolhardy to go through an uncontrolled, blind intersection quickly without at least a look or a small toot on the horn.
5) 'They have itty bitty cars.' Another slowly fading myth. The subcompact is the norm, but you will have to look hard these days to see what I was told was the 'typical Italian car', a 500 cc Fiat. As Italy has gotten more affluent, cars have been getting bigger, and you will be hard pressed to rent a car with less than 750 cc's. The 750 cc Fiat Panda that I drove could make it up to 85 m.p.h. on a straight flat road with three people and luggage. It had trouble up mountains, and it had a bit of sway in the curves, but it was quite serviceable.
6) 'There is no place to park.' This is not a myth. However, it is not as bad as you would think. There are usually large parking areas outside of the center of cities. And within cities, what makes for an acceptable parking place may be called a sidewalk in America. I have been told that the typical evolution of a parking space in Italy goes as follows.
"People are walking in the middle of the street because cars are parked directly next to buildings.
A sidewalk is made.
The cars park on the sidewalk.
A government employee is paid to collect a parking fee from those on the sidewalk.
Go to point #1. "
Still, because of parking and driving restrictions in the Triad, if time does not permit you to visit the smaller cities, towns and the countryside, I would suggest you forgo a car and stick to the train.
7) 'They do the strangest things on the highway.' What we consider strange is a consequence of the wider variety of vehicle powers, and what constitutes courtesy while passing. Some smaller vehicles that would never be allowed on American Interstates are found on the Autostrade at restricted speeds (80 or even 60 km/h; approx. 50 and 38 m.p.h., respectively). For most cars on most of the Autostrade, the speed limit is 100 km/h (61 m.p.h.). This is as widely ignored as our speed limits are. Above what we would consider 'reasonable speeding', Mercedes, BMW's and Alfa Romeo's go as fast as their engines will allow. To deal with this there is a four-step protocol for passing and being passed.
If being passed, you should put the right set of tires on the shoulder, if at all practical. This makes two lanes three. I have been able to pass on two lane roads in Italy with traffic approaching because the approaching car put their right wheel on the shoulder, too. This action is not for the unfamiliar or the faint of heart.
If you are passing, but intend to maintain speed, and return to the right (most of us), you should leave your left turn signal on until you are ready to return to the right when you change to your right turn signal.
If you are traveling in the left lane, and intend to go as fast as your car allows, do not put on your turn signal.
If you are in the left lane, approaching someone from behind who is going slower and you have no turn signal on, flash your lights at them. It is their responsibility to get out of your way. If you are on the receiving end of one of these 'light horns', act quickly or you will get run over. This is particularly frightening when going through a tunnel on a bright day, you cannot see the lines on the road well and someone comes up from behind.
8) 'I would just get lost.' You are right, but this should not overly upset you. You should not keep so tight a schedule that getting lost will harm you too much. Violent crime in Italy is very low, so, as opposed to America, being lost in a city is not a threat to life or limb. Besides, being lost can be scheduled in. A good estimate is that getting lost the first time will cost you about 20 minutes and any more after that will cost about 15 minutes. The more important time is, the more 'losts' you schedule in. Hotel reservations should have a 'three lost' cushion (50 minutes). Getting to a museum when it first opens needs only a 'one lost' cushion (20 minutes). So what if you get there early? Find a gelateria and have a two scoop lemon ice cream, or take a chair and have a Campari and soda or just sit in the piazza and watch children chase pigeons.
One Year of Blogging!
One year ago today I started my life as a blogger and invited all of you to join in me in Our Italian Adventure. What a year it has been and how fast it has gone by! The girls have grown, Sam started a new career and I had to give up the better view in the office. Sam now sits in my spot. Oh well, I rather like having him close by, for that I will give up the better seat.
I have enjoyed sharing my life in Italy with all of you and I hope that you keep on clicking over and reading the blog!
The spumante is in the fridge and as soon as I get Anna safely on her way, for she is going skiing AGAIN, I am popping the cork! Of course Sarah is already at her second home, Virginia's. Sam and I are all alone once again! Though, he is not doing so well. I tell you more about that in my next blog!
Salut!
Krista
I have enjoyed sharing my life in Italy with all of you and I hope that you keep on clicking over and reading the blog!
The spumante is in the fridge and as soon as I get Anna safely on her way, for she is going skiing AGAIN, I am popping the cork! Of course Sarah is already at her second home, Virginia's. Sam and I are all alone once again! Though, he is not doing so well. I tell you more about that in my next blog!
Salut!
Krista
Life on Long Island
I got this today from my childhood friend Sharon. We grew up together ON Long Island and shared many an adventure during our teenage years... Every thing said in this little ditty is true, and I know I could add a few new ones myself. I always have said everywhere I have lived, Long Island is the best place to grow up and the worst place to live. Getting on of off the Island is like putting on a tight pair of jeans, they're hard to get into, and even harder to get out of....
One disclaimer... I have seen this before, it has been circulating amongst we Long Islanders for a few years....
Enjoy!
Good ones:
You live in the shadow of the greatest city in the world, but you almost never go there.
When you're away from Long Island, you love it and when you're there, you don't.
You think if you're not from Long Island or NYC, you're not really from New York.
You know the exact point at which Queens turns into Nassau simply on intuition.
You don't go to Manhattan; you go to "The City".
At some point in your life you've gone clamming.
Either your parents or your grandparents lived in the city.
You don't live in Long Island. You live ON Long Island
You know where the Commack Motor Inn is.
You can correctly pronounce places like Happauge, Commack, Islip, Islandia, Massapequa.
You know the location of 6 malls and a dozen McDonalds and 36 7-11's.
You never, ever want to "change at Jamaica..."
You've tried to find the Amityville Horror house.
You've had a seagull crap on your car.
You have or someone you know has fallen asleep on the LIRR and ended up in one of these three places; Babylon, Port Washington or Hicksville.
You went to an elementary school that promoted dodge ball as the number 1 game among children 7-13.
You've missed that "Drunk Train", the 2:42 out of Penn and had the dreaded wait until 5:30.
You or someone you know has owned an animal that came from North Shore Animal League.
The Long Island Expressway isn't really as bad as everybody thinks.
You don't associate Fire Island with gay men.
You know which parts of the Godfather were filmed on Long Island.
You've paid a $10 cover charge to get into a bar, but got nothing for it.
You think Islip MacArthur airport is cute and you enjoy watching it grow up.
Billy Joel said it best, "either you date a rich girl from the North Shore, or a cool girl from the South Shore". (I am a cool girl from the South Shore)
You don't really see the big deal about the Hamptons, unless you got smashed at the Bordy barn.
When people ask "where are you from?" you answer Long Guy Land and automatically assume everyone in the world knows that answer means New York.
You've always liked Billy Joel and you own several of his "records"
The Belt Parkway sucks!
Your parents took you to Nathans or Carvel (on the way home from the beach.( It was the Roadside Rest when we went) (Marvel for me)
You remember Grumman
You know the color of the water at Jones Beach was not BLUE!
You knew of Massapequa before the Amy Fisher-Joey Buttafuoco nightmare
You thought going to Queens was a hike
The first time you heard the term "Long Island Iced Tea" you were somewhere else and you laughed.
When you live somewhere else and are astounded to see that people actually stop at yellow lights.
You just sort of presume that wherever you live, you'll be able to find good delis, good pizza, and good bagels.
You can name at least three bands that came from Long Island.
When you walk in the city and you see two men holding hands...it becomes normal to you.
You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends from Long Island.
Mediocre ones:
You never realize you have an accent till you leave.
You know White Castle is terrible for you and the food sucks but you periodically "Get the Crave".
You want the Yankees to stay in the Bronx, but would probably go to more games if they moved to Manhattan.
Quick! Who's the Suffolk County Executive? Don't know do you?!
You've never taken an MTA bus.
Regular gas - $3.39 and you still pay it!!!
You've gotten drunk on the bleachers of some high school
You were upset when all the Roy Rogers turned into Wendy's.
You can spout off all the LIRR stops between Penn Station and Ronkonkoma
Paying $35 for a haircut doesn't sound so crazy.
You think the people from Brooklyn are "da wunz dat tawk wit a accent"
Sledding in the sumps
No word ends in an ER, just an AH.
You'd pay $8.50 for a movie.
Your distant future might involve the state of Florida.
No, you don't want mustard on that burger!!
You hate paying tolls.
You don't have to go far to see your family.
You miss wiffle Ball and running through sprinklers.
One disclaimer... I have seen this before, it has been circulating amongst we Long Islanders for a few years....
Enjoy!
Good ones:
You live in the shadow of the greatest city in the world, but you almost never go there.
When you're away from Long Island, you love it and when you're there, you don't.
You think if you're not from Long Island or NYC, you're not really from New York.
You know the exact point at which Queens turns into Nassau simply on intuition.
You don't go to Manhattan; you go to "The City".
At some point in your life you've gone clamming.
Either your parents or your grandparents lived in the city.
You don't live in Long Island. You live ON Long Island
You know where the Commack Motor Inn is.
You can correctly pronounce places like Happauge, Commack, Islip, Islandia, Massapequa.
You know the location of 6 malls and a dozen McDonalds and 36 7-11's.
You never, ever want to "change at Jamaica..."
You've tried to find the Amityville Horror house.
You've had a seagull crap on your car.
You have or someone you know has fallen asleep on the LIRR and ended up in one of these three places; Babylon, Port Washington or Hicksville.
You went to an elementary school that promoted dodge ball as the number 1 game among children 7-13.
You've missed that "Drunk Train", the 2:42 out of Penn and had the dreaded wait until 5:30.
You or someone you know has owned an animal that came from North Shore Animal League.
The Long Island Expressway isn't really as bad as everybody thinks.
You don't associate Fire Island with gay men.
You know which parts of the Godfather were filmed on Long Island.
You've paid a $10 cover charge to get into a bar, but got nothing for it.
You think Islip MacArthur airport is cute and you enjoy watching it grow up.
Billy Joel said it best, "either you date a rich girl from the North Shore, or a cool girl from the South Shore". (I am a cool girl from the South Shore)
You don't really see the big deal about the Hamptons, unless you got smashed at the Bordy barn.
When people ask "where are you from?" you answer Long Guy Land and automatically assume everyone in the world knows that answer means New York.
You've always liked Billy Joel and you own several of his "records"
The Belt Parkway sucks!
Your parents took you to Nathans or Carvel (on the way home from the beach.( It was the Roadside Rest when we went) (Marvel for me)
You remember Grumman
You know the color of the water at Jones Beach was not BLUE!
You knew of Massapequa before the Amy Fisher-Joey Buttafuoco nightmare
You thought going to Queens was a hike
The first time you heard the term "Long Island Iced Tea" you were somewhere else and you laughed.
When you live somewhere else and are astounded to see that people actually stop at yellow lights.
You just sort of presume that wherever you live, you'll be able to find good delis, good pizza, and good bagels.
You can name at least three bands that came from Long Island.
When you walk in the city and you see two men holding hands...it becomes normal to you.
You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends from Long Island.
Mediocre ones:
You never realize you have an accent till you leave.
You know White Castle is terrible for you and the food sucks but you periodically "Get the Crave".
You want the Yankees to stay in the Bronx, but would probably go to more games if they moved to Manhattan.
Quick! Who's the Suffolk County Executive? Don't know do you?!
You've never taken an MTA bus.
Regular gas - $3.39 and you still pay it!!!
You've gotten drunk on the bleachers of some high school
You were upset when all the Roy Rogers turned into Wendy's.
You can spout off all the LIRR stops between Penn Station and Ronkonkoma
Paying $35 for a haircut doesn't sound so crazy.
You think the people from Brooklyn are "da wunz dat tawk wit a accent"
Sledding in the sumps
No word ends in an ER, just an AH.
You'd pay $8.50 for a movie.
Your distant future might involve the state of Florida.
No, you don't want mustard on that burger!!
You hate paying tolls.
You don't have to go far to see your family.
You miss wiffle Ball and running through sprinklers.
Wednesday, March 08, 2006
Came across this little one while searching the headlines for news about International Women's Day. I found it on Homemakers.com. Feminine strengths instead of femminist strengths.....Imagine that!
10 reasons why it's great to be a woman
Celebrate International Women's Day with a fun look at feminine strengths.
By Carlye Malchuk
March 8 of each year marks International Women's Day. Established in 1977 by the United Nations, it's a day to celebrate how far the women's movement has come and focus on the work that remains -- work that'll lead us to a world in which opportunity is presented to all, without bias.
"One never notices what has been done; one can only see what remains to be done." -- Marie Curie, 20th Century Nobel Prize winning scientist.
While International Women's Day serves as a reminder of what must be done on behalf of women's rights, there are many reasons to celebrate the female spirit. Neither our hardships, nor our virtues should be ignored.
In honour of ladies everywhere, here are 10 reasons why it's great to be a woman:
10. We have the best of both worlds
A woman can be tough or gentle, strong or subdued. We can go on a 10-kilometre hike and, the same day, attend an event wearing a little black dress with strappy sandals. What's the best part of having so many choices? Not having to stick with just one.
9. We can laugh when we're sad, and cry when we're happy
Some say a woman's emotions are her greatest weaknesses, but they're her greatest strengths.
8. We are the ultimate multi-taskers
A woman can keep house, keep her career on track and keep going. As internationally renowned author Jean Shinoda Bolen wrote: "women are experienced in looking after the children and fragile elders, cleaning up, setting the house in order, being frugal with resources, putting food on the table, maintaining peace in the family, and staying on good terms with the neighbours." And that's in our down time!
7. We can always find a new face in the makeup bag
A woman's appearance can be her greatest ally and her most feared enemy, often in the course of a day. Yet no matter how we think we look, our masterful skills with a makeup brush and natural radiance can produce a wonder of the world.
"Curve: The loveliest distance between two points." -- Mae West, American film legend.
6. Our beauty is second only to our strength
It has been written that a woman grieving a loss will find strength even when she thinks there is no strength left. Across the country and around the world, women who have lost loved ones courageously take up the cause, hoping to ensure their tragedy doesn't happen again.
One of North America's best-known charities is Mothers Against Drunk Driving (MADD). With American and Canadian chapters, MADD was founded in 1980 by Candy Lightner, who took up the fight against drunk driving after her 13-year-old daughter was killed by a drunk driver.
5. We are the champions
At the 2006 Winter Olympics in Turin, Italy, Canadian athletes had a strong showing. Stronger yet were the female Canadian athletes, who brought home 16 of our 24 medals, including Cindy Klassen who won a record five medals in one Olympics.
4. We are global peacekeepers
Mother's Day has come to mean a day of flowers and cards and warm, fuzzy messages. But in 1870, Julia Ward Howe had a different idea. Howe, who wrote Battle Hymn of the Republic, was devastated by the destruction and death in the aftermath of the American Civil War. With war beginning again in Europe, Howe wrote the original Mother's Day Proclamation. She called on women around the world to join together and find means to bring peace to the world "in the name of womanhood and of humanity."
3. Our support system rivals any in the world -- our girlfriends
Any woman with close girlfriends knows how valuable they are. As our confidantes, friends, sources of encouragement and reality checks, they are our ultimate support systems.
2. The unbreakable bond between a mother and her child
Becoming a mother is an indescribable experience and although Arnold Schwarzenegger tried it in the 1994 comedy Junior, women alone experience the joy and blessing of childbirth.
"Making the decision to have a child is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body." -- Elizabeth Stone, 19th century feminist, institutionalized by her family for holding different religious beliefs.
1. We can make change happen
Many of us in developed nations have equal rights and freedoms because women of decades -- and centuries -- past diligently fought for them. But for many, equality remains a dream.
A United Nations report stated "women constitute half of the world's population, perform nearly two thirds of its work hours, receive one-tenth of the world's income and own less than one-hundredth of the world's property."
But this is changing.
Every day, more women join the cause of creating global equality, ensuring the world they pass on to their children will be better than the one their mothers passed on to them.
"Many persons have a wrong idea of what constitutes true happiness. It is not attained through self-gratification but through fidelity to a worthy purpose." -- Helen Keller, a deaf and blind woman who became a role model for millions.
10 reasons why it's great to be a woman
Celebrate International Women's Day with a fun look at feminine strengths.
By Carlye Malchuk
March 8 of each year marks International Women's Day. Established in 1977 by the United Nations, it's a day to celebrate how far the women's movement has come and focus on the work that remains -- work that'll lead us to a world in which opportunity is presented to all, without bias.
"One never notices what has been done; one can only see what remains to be done." -- Marie Curie, 20th Century Nobel Prize winning scientist.
While International Women's Day serves as a reminder of what must be done on behalf of women's rights, there are many reasons to celebrate the female spirit. Neither our hardships, nor our virtues should be ignored.
In honour of ladies everywhere, here are 10 reasons why it's great to be a woman:
10. We have the best of both worlds
A woman can be tough or gentle, strong or subdued. We can go on a 10-kilometre hike and, the same day, attend an event wearing a little black dress with strappy sandals. What's the best part of having so many choices? Not having to stick with just one.
9. We can laugh when we're sad, and cry when we're happy
Some say a woman's emotions are her greatest weaknesses, but they're her greatest strengths.
8. We are the ultimate multi-taskers
A woman can keep house, keep her career on track and keep going. As internationally renowned author Jean Shinoda Bolen wrote: "women are experienced in looking after the children and fragile elders, cleaning up, setting the house in order, being frugal with resources, putting food on the table, maintaining peace in the family, and staying on good terms with the neighbours." And that's in our down time!
7. We can always find a new face in the makeup bag
A woman's appearance can be her greatest ally and her most feared enemy, often in the course of a day. Yet no matter how we think we look, our masterful skills with a makeup brush and natural radiance can produce a wonder of the world.
"Curve: The loveliest distance between two points." -- Mae West, American film legend.
6. Our beauty is second only to our strength
It has been written that a woman grieving a loss will find strength even when she thinks there is no strength left. Across the country and around the world, women who have lost loved ones courageously take up the cause, hoping to ensure their tragedy doesn't happen again.
One of North America's best-known charities is Mothers Against Drunk Driving (MADD). With American and Canadian chapters, MADD was founded in 1980 by Candy Lightner, who took up the fight against drunk driving after her 13-year-old daughter was killed by a drunk driver.
5. We are the champions
At the 2006 Winter Olympics in Turin, Italy, Canadian athletes had a strong showing. Stronger yet were the female Canadian athletes, who brought home 16 of our 24 medals, including Cindy Klassen who won a record five medals in one Olympics.
4. We are global peacekeepers
Mother's Day has come to mean a day of flowers and cards and warm, fuzzy messages. But in 1870, Julia Ward Howe had a different idea. Howe, who wrote Battle Hymn of the Republic, was devastated by the destruction and death in the aftermath of the American Civil War. With war beginning again in Europe, Howe wrote the original Mother's Day Proclamation. She called on women around the world to join together and find means to bring peace to the world "in the name of womanhood and of humanity."
3. Our support system rivals any in the world -- our girlfriends
Any woman with close girlfriends knows how valuable they are. As our confidantes, friends, sources of encouragement and reality checks, they are our ultimate support systems.
2. The unbreakable bond between a mother and her child
Becoming a mother is an indescribable experience and although Arnold Schwarzenegger tried it in the 1994 comedy Junior, women alone experience the joy and blessing of childbirth.
"Making the decision to have a child is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body." -- Elizabeth Stone, 19th century feminist, institutionalized by her family for holding different religious beliefs.
1. We can make change happen
Many of us in developed nations have equal rights and freedoms because women of decades -- and centuries -- past diligently fought for them. But for many, equality remains a dream.
A United Nations report stated "women constitute half of the world's population, perform nearly two thirds of its work hours, receive one-tenth of the world's income and own less than one-hundredth of the world's property."
But this is changing.
Every day, more women join the cause of creating global equality, ensuring the world they pass on to their children will be better than the one their mothers passed on to them.
"Many persons have a wrong idea of what constitutes true happiness. It is not attained through self-gratification but through fidelity to a worthy purpose." -- Helen Keller, a deaf and blind woman who became a role model for millions.
International Women's Day
Yes, today is International Women's Day. A holiday celebrated all over the world, though I cannot really say I remember marking its importance in the US of A. What is Women's Day? Well I can assure you it is not Mother's day. It is a Feminist/Socialist/Communist celebration founded at the turn of the 20th century. It celebrates women's achievements and how far we still need to go to be on even footing with men. Though, I think Western women have it pretty good. We participate fully in life and have so many choices some us choose them all and become super women. But, I digress. Click here and you can read all about International Women's Day yourself.
In Italy, Women's Day means you see mimosa blooming all over town and to mark the day, bunches of the yellow flowers are traditionally given away to women. Posters for traveling male dance reviews (not the ballet, but strippers - think Chippendales) announcing their arrival and times of the shows. It is sort of a tradition amongst women my age to go to these shows. A sort of we can let loose and objectify the opposite sex too. Amnesty International had a stand set up today in one of the main piazzas in town. Best of all, the pasticcerie (bakeries) had yummy sweets for the giving and eating in their windows.
Me, I am indifferent to the whole thing. I don't need to go see naked men dancing, to feel like a woman, besides, they are most likely gay anyway. Isn't it enough I am married? I learned a long time ago that looking at a naked man is not the road to fulfillment. Certainly, I do not need to eat sweets to feel happy, they only serve to make me fat and unhappy. Flowers, hmm, I would enjoy being given those, but, you could do that any day you like and I like something more than mimosa branches. I asked Sarah what she thought of the whole thing. Rather intelligently she replied, "I don't have to behave like a man to be a women". She might be on to something. Me, I will stick with celebrating Mother's Day. I think I earned it.
Cheers,
Krista
In Italy, Women's Day means you see mimosa blooming all over town and to mark the day, bunches of the yellow flowers are traditionally given away to women. Posters for traveling male dance reviews (not the ballet, but strippers - think Chippendales) announcing their arrival and times of the shows. It is sort of a tradition amongst women my age to go to these shows. A sort of we can let loose and objectify the opposite sex too. Amnesty International had a stand set up today in one of the main piazzas in town. Best of all, the pasticcerie (bakeries) had yummy sweets for the giving and eating in their windows.
Me, I am indifferent to the whole thing. I don't need to go see naked men dancing, to feel like a woman, besides, they are most likely gay anyway. Isn't it enough I am married? I learned a long time ago that looking at a naked man is not the road to fulfillment. Certainly, I do not need to eat sweets to feel happy, they only serve to make me fat and unhappy. Flowers, hmm, I would enjoy being given those, but, you could do that any day you like and I like something more than mimosa branches. I asked Sarah what she thought of the whole thing. Rather intelligently she replied, "I don't have to behave like a man to be a women". She might be on to something. Me, I will stick with celebrating Mother's Day. I think I earned it.
Cheers,
Krista
Friday, March 03, 2006
Where is the Green Party When You Need Them?
Who would ever have thought they would hear those words coming out of my mouth?
Yes, I am screaming for the Greens to come to Chiavari and save those beautiful magnolia trees in this photo! For those of you who live in Chiavari, you already know, the street where I live has famously been called "La Via Delle Palme" One important point. Our street is no longer lined in palms. It is lined with magnolias. Big, Beautiful, and full of flowers when they bloom. When and why the palms were replaced by the magnolias, I do no know.
Why am I calling for the environmentalists? Seems the city of Chiavari's current administration want to replace (meaning cut down) the magnolias with palm trees and turn our beautiful boulevard back to the Via delle Palme!!! This, in my humble opinion, is ludicrous. Why would anyone want to take down perfectly healthy mature trees and put instead palms that will take years to grow and mature, if they grow at all. To top it off, this folly, for lets face it, it is one, will cost the city an additional ?180,000! For what? Vanity. Trees cannot just be changed like flower beds! I can think of 100's of other better uses for that money, and if it had to be spent on my street, how about paying someone to police the people who walk their dogs and do not clean up after them? Seems an easier way to "beautify" the city! Anyone who has walked down my street on a hot day would agree.
Where does this leave me and my anger over this stupidness? This morning my neighbor was on our sidewalk outside our building soliciting for signatures for her petition against replacing the magnolias. Of course I signed it and took a petition of my own to pass around for signatures! Watch out! I am angry and I am asking every one I know in Chiavari to sign my petition.
Funny, it has taken a "green" ideal to motivate me to do something political in Italy! So, if you are one of my Italian friends reading this, please sign the petition!
A presto!
Krista
Yes, I am screaming for the Greens to come to Chiavari and save those beautiful magnolia trees in this photo! For those of you who live in Chiavari, you already know, the street where I live has famously been called "La Via Delle Palme" One important point. Our street is no longer lined in palms. It is lined with magnolias. Big, Beautiful, and full of flowers when they bloom. When and why the palms were replaced by the magnolias, I do no know.
Why am I calling for the environmentalists? Seems the city of Chiavari's current administration want to replace (meaning cut down) the magnolias with palm trees and turn our beautiful boulevard back to the Via delle Palme!!! This, in my humble opinion, is ludicrous. Why would anyone want to take down perfectly healthy mature trees and put instead palms that will take years to grow and mature, if they grow at all. To top it off, this folly, for lets face it, it is one, will cost the city an additional ?180,000! For what? Vanity. Trees cannot just be changed like flower beds! I can think of 100's of other better uses for that money, and if it had to be spent on my street, how about paying someone to police the people who walk their dogs and do not clean up after them? Seems an easier way to "beautify" the city! Anyone who has walked down my street on a hot day would agree.
Where does this leave me and my anger over this stupidness? This morning my neighbor was on our sidewalk outside our building soliciting for signatures for her petition against replacing the magnolias. Of course I signed it and took a petition of my own to pass around for signatures! Watch out! I am angry and I am asking every one I know in Chiavari to sign my petition.
Funny, it has taken a "green" ideal to motivate me to do something political in Italy! So, if you are one of my Italian friends reading this, please sign the petition!
A presto!
Krista
Back to the "Big Question"
I came across this today while reading the online version of the Wall Street Journal's opinion page. While reading this I couldn't help but think of the conversations I have had with by Dad about his childhood and how it differs from my own and my children's. For my dad, a depression era child, it was not unusual to leave the house alone or with his friends. He would leave in the morning and not come home till dark. His mom, my grandmother, would go to do the shopping, by foot, and leave him home in the yard, alone and locked out of the house and he just got on with it. He always walked to and from school twice a day, for he always went home for lunch, alone or with his siblings. There were always bullies along the way, he most of the time managed to stay out of their path. He spent hours on his own in the woods around his house figuring out how to entertain himself, and I suppose, though he won't ever tell me, must have gotten into some kind of trouble along the way. As my dad always says, my how times have changed. To raise a child like that today, would be shocking - it would be child neglect. Yet, somehow my dad and his siblings, in all 5, did okay. In fact, they are all successful and still alive and kicking, all in their eighties. My grandparents must have done something right.
As you read this op ed, here is some food for thought... Today in our quest for perfect children with perfect childhoods taking something very important away from our children. Privacy. Independence. By trying to be modern parents who are "in tune" with our kids, in other words, trying to be our child's best friend, entering a zone we should never be in? Our child's world. Do we really belong there?
Read on and tell me what you think. I think you know what I think.....
Letting Go
Hey, parents, leave those kids alone!
BY SAM SCHULMAN
In the midst of my 1950s childhood, the playwright Robert Paul Smith published a quirky little book that became a best seller called "Where Did You Go? Out. What Did You Do? Nothing." It was a laconic evocation of the independent lives that Depression children contrived for themselves in the era before postwar affluence. And its subtitle--"How it was when you were a kid, and how things have deteriorated since"--condemned, by contrast, the coddled, structured, supervised and superabundant childhoods of my own generation.
Though "Where Did You Go?" was written for our parents, every child I knew made sure to get hold of a copy. A year after its publication, we children were the target of a sequel: "How to Do Nothing With Nobody All Alone by Yourself." It featured seductively grim drawings of spare little toys and games you could make out of wooden matchsticks, empty spools of thread, tin cans and rubber bands. I, for one, went right to work. Trying to carve a boat out of a wine cork, I cut my thumb to the bone with my Cub Scout pocketknife. My quest for the simple life of an earlier time ended, sitting with my disgusted father, in a Chicago hospital emergency room.
But any envy that we children of the '50s felt toward the sparse childhood of our grandparents faded quickly. Now we have children of our own, and we're determined that they should never be alone, should never go out and must never do nothing. Despite all the opportunities for independence that our way of life should give them--with both parents working and huge increases in disposable income--the fact is that our children are part of the most closely watched generation in history.
The watching begins in primary school. The days are no more when knots of children wandered erratically to their schoolhouse or back home. They step out of sliding minivan doors in the morning and are quickly whisked away the moment the bell rings, driven in quick succession to gymnastics, soccer, karate or violin lessons.
And the lazy days of summer are over, too. Not only will few kids be playing out on the street when the weather warms up, but the ones who go away to summer camp will be in constant contact with their parents, sending daily emails with pictures and reporting on each of their activities.
As kids grow older and begin to take an interest in something more than kickball, it turns out that even romance isn't off-limits. Today's parents don't want to be the strict, distant types of yesteryear, handing down judgments that may cause moments of unpleasantness. They want to be "friends" who hear about--and show sympathy for--the travails of dating and "relationships." As social commentator Leonard Steinhorn boasts in a recent book on the baby boomers: "Candor and openness--not rigidity and distance--have become the norms in American families today."
The parental connection does not wither away after high-school graduation. Cell phones keep college students tethered to their parents--parents who might have been sent off to college, like my freshman roommate in 1967, with 12 stamped, preaddressed envelopes in which to insert a weekly letter home. Email and text-messages now allow for minute-by-minute updates. One recent study by a college revealed that its freshmen were in touch with their parents by cell phone as many as 15 times a day.
Parental hovering has not simply produced a large number of inane conversations--"I'm on my way to class, I'm walking into the building"--it has destroyed the private lives of children. Kids no longer have the privilege of making their own worlds and participating in a separate culture. This kind of childhood was celebrated not only by Robert Paul Smith but by Peter and Iona Opie in "Lore and Language of Schoolchildren" (1959). The Opies discovered that teasing games, hide-and-seek and tag, have been around at least since the time of Chaucer.
Another version of childhood as a separate realm is visible in Booth Tarkington's Penrod books, which were published in 1914 and 1916 and remained best sellers until midcentury. The American childhood that Tarkington's children experienced was beset by grown-ups, but they wanted to impose adult responsibilities on the young ones, not supervise their childhood adventures. Penrod's traumas came from haircuts, dancing lessons, school arithmetic and mixed-sex parties where he was expected to act like "a little gentleman." His parents--a stern father and a sentimental mother--knew that there were certain things he needed to be taught but generally let Penrod look after his own childhood.
So why can't parents today leave their children alone for five minutes? There are probably a number of reasons. Some no doubt worry that the coarse surrounding culture is a constant threat--and indeed it is. But it is much more likely to intrude on the computer or on television--two aspects of life often unmonitored by parents--than at a playground or summer camp. Another reason may be an exaggerated sense of our own importance in producing the persons our children are destined to become.
A recent Wall Street Journal story about the growing reluctance of affluent families to send their children to boarding schools illustrates the point. One couple, who chose not to send their daughter to a famous New England prep school, rationalized their decision like this: "We just want to spend a couple of more years imparting our values to our daughter."
Yes, parents impart values. But values come from other useful sources, too. Hovering parents undermine the influence not only of other institutions like schools and churches but of peers. Being picked for a sports team, facing the first day at school or at a job, learning to handle the ups and downs of courtship, enduring the apprenticeship of almost any career--these are not only signs that our children are becoming independent adults, but acts of initiation that take them out of the family embrace and into the wider world.
The seemingly obvious notion that kids need to be left alone sometimes if they are to grow up has been so lost that more than one American university has been forced to station security guards outside freshmen orientation sessions to keep anxious parents out. There are no reports, encouragingly, of freshmen on the other side trying to pull their parents in.
As you read this op ed, here is some food for thought... Today in our quest for perfect children with perfect childhoods taking something very important away from our children. Privacy. Independence. By trying to be modern parents who are "in tune" with our kids, in other words, trying to be our child's best friend, entering a zone we should never be in? Our child's world. Do we really belong there?
Read on and tell me what you think. I think you know what I think.....
Letting Go
Hey, parents, leave those kids alone!
BY SAM SCHULMAN
In the midst of my 1950s childhood, the playwright Robert Paul Smith published a quirky little book that became a best seller called "Where Did You Go? Out. What Did You Do? Nothing." It was a laconic evocation of the independent lives that Depression children contrived for themselves in the era before postwar affluence. And its subtitle--"How it was when you were a kid, and how things have deteriorated since"--condemned, by contrast, the coddled, structured, supervised and superabundant childhoods of my own generation.
Though "Where Did You Go?" was written for our parents, every child I knew made sure to get hold of a copy. A year after its publication, we children were the target of a sequel: "How to Do Nothing With Nobody All Alone by Yourself." It featured seductively grim drawings of spare little toys and games you could make out of wooden matchsticks, empty spools of thread, tin cans and rubber bands. I, for one, went right to work. Trying to carve a boat out of a wine cork, I cut my thumb to the bone with my Cub Scout pocketknife. My quest for the simple life of an earlier time ended, sitting with my disgusted father, in a Chicago hospital emergency room.
But any envy that we children of the '50s felt toward the sparse childhood of our grandparents faded quickly. Now we have children of our own, and we're determined that they should never be alone, should never go out and must never do nothing. Despite all the opportunities for independence that our way of life should give them--with both parents working and huge increases in disposable income--the fact is that our children are part of the most closely watched generation in history.
The watching begins in primary school. The days are no more when knots of children wandered erratically to their schoolhouse or back home. They step out of sliding minivan doors in the morning and are quickly whisked away the moment the bell rings, driven in quick succession to gymnastics, soccer, karate or violin lessons.
And the lazy days of summer are over, too. Not only will few kids be playing out on the street when the weather warms up, but the ones who go away to summer camp will be in constant contact with their parents, sending daily emails with pictures and reporting on each of their activities.
As kids grow older and begin to take an interest in something more than kickball, it turns out that even romance isn't off-limits. Today's parents don't want to be the strict, distant types of yesteryear, handing down judgments that may cause moments of unpleasantness. They want to be "friends" who hear about--and show sympathy for--the travails of dating and "relationships." As social commentator Leonard Steinhorn boasts in a recent book on the baby boomers: "Candor and openness--not rigidity and distance--have become the norms in American families today."
The parental connection does not wither away after high-school graduation. Cell phones keep college students tethered to their parents--parents who might have been sent off to college, like my freshman roommate in 1967, with 12 stamped, preaddressed envelopes in which to insert a weekly letter home. Email and text-messages now allow for minute-by-minute updates. One recent study by a college revealed that its freshmen were in touch with their parents by cell phone as many as 15 times a day.
Parental hovering has not simply produced a large number of inane conversations--"I'm on my way to class, I'm walking into the building"--it has destroyed the private lives of children. Kids no longer have the privilege of making their own worlds and participating in a separate culture. This kind of childhood was celebrated not only by Robert Paul Smith but by Peter and Iona Opie in "Lore and Language of Schoolchildren" (1959). The Opies discovered that teasing games, hide-and-seek and tag, have been around at least since the time of Chaucer.
Another version of childhood as a separate realm is visible in Booth Tarkington's Penrod books, which were published in 1914 and 1916 and remained best sellers until midcentury. The American childhood that Tarkington's children experienced was beset by grown-ups, but they wanted to impose adult responsibilities on the young ones, not supervise their childhood adventures. Penrod's traumas came from haircuts, dancing lessons, school arithmetic and mixed-sex parties where he was expected to act like "a little gentleman." His parents--a stern father and a sentimental mother--knew that there were certain things he needed to be taught but generally let Penrod look after his own childhood.
So why can't parents today leave their children alone for five minutes? There are probably a number of reasons. Some no doubt worry that the coarse surrounding culture is a constant threat--and indeed it is. But it is much more likely to intrude on the computer or on television--two aspects of life often unmonitored by parents--than at a playground or summer camp. Another reason may be an exaggerated sense of our own importance in producing the persons our children are destined to become.
A recent Wall Street Journal story about the growing reluctance of affluent families to send their children to boarding schools illustrates the point. One couple, who chose not to send their daughter to a famous New England prep school, rationalized their decision like this: "We just want to spend a couple of more years imparting our values to our daughter."
Yes, parents impart values. But values come from other useful sources, too. Hovering parents undermine the influence not only of other institutions like schools and churches but of peers. Being picked for a sports team, facing the first day at school or at a job, learning to handle the ups and downs of courtship, enduring the apprenticeship of almost any career--these are not only signs that our children are becoming independent adults, but acts of initiation that take them out of the family embrace and into the wider world.
The seemingly obvious notion that kids need to be left alone sometimes if they are to grow up has been so lost that more than one American university has been forced to station security guards outside freshmen orientation sessions to keep anxious parents out. There are no reports, encouragingly, of freshmen on the other side trying to pull their parents in.
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