Our Italian Adventure: Concerti!

In June our lives become a blur. As the days get longer and schools winds down, the weekends are a constant stream of "events" building up to the day when take our seats on the jet that flies us to JFK....

This weekend was no exception, and, it was a weekend of firsts for Sarah....

Friday... Sarah debuted her new violin with the Orchestra Giovanile del Conservatorio Nicolò Paganini at the Monastero di Santa Chiara in Genoa.

This was only second performance since being invited to join the young orchestra this winter. Normally, the practices start in the fall, but this year thanks to strikes and how things go in Italy, the young musicians got a late start. Even though, they sounded terrific and were extremely professional. The program ranged from Haydn to Vivaldi to Bach and the kids never seemed to miss a note. The audience? Many of us still don't know when to clap and when to not clap. Classical music is funny that way. One should never clap between movements, only at the end of a piece. But, the conductor, who is great with the kids is also great with the audience. First time we clapped when weren't supposed to, he reprimanded us with a no - no wave with his baton! I get the feeling he is teaching us along with his students.

Saturday night saw Sarah giving a repeat performance, only this time, she was in Moneglia (not far from the Cinque Terre) at the Oratorio dei Disciplinanti. And... this time, we had to PAY to see Sarah perform! Our first time ever paying to hear our daughter play her violin. The audience was made up of mostly family and friends of the young musicians, but, a local hotel bought a few rows of tickets for their guests. Just think, right now, some German tourist might be blogging about the fabulous young orchestra from the conservatory in Genoa he saw this weekend.

This weekend while listening to my daughter play her violin with the other talented young musicians in the orchestra who are from not only Genoa, but from many other parts of the world - Russia, Armenia, even another young American. I started to think that maybe living here is not so bad after all. That even though I struggle living in this country and feel the life I have built is temporary. Maybe I haven't done so bad after all. And all that we might have given up by living here, may be overshadowed by what we have gained. Look at Sarah, would she have had the opportunity to be exposed to and study with such high calibre musicians if we had stayed in San Diego? I will never know.

Like the language, which no matter how much a try to be fluent in, eludes me. Life here at times does too. The chaos, which seems to have no end. The bureaucracy that ties your life in knots. Feeling like a foreigner each time you step out of the door. And then you look at your kids and it hits you. They don't feel any of this. They know of no other life. They are in some little way, becoming Italian.

I may never fully immerse myself in Italy and I will never feel Italian, yet, I am changed. I know that I am not the same person I was when I arrived in here 9 years ago. And, you know, that is not so bad.

The thought hit me while listening to Sarah and her friends. Maybe what I am longing for is really what I mourn. A way of life. My way of life. Simply being an American and living amongst familiar surroundings. And the sadness that I feel, that no matter how many turkeys I roast for Thanksgiving will never cure, is quite normal. Really, when do we never miss something in our lives? Are we ever complete?

Sarah and Anna are merging two worlds and many ways, that might make them different. You know what? That ain't so bad. Isn't "different" quite like being extraordinary, novel, individual, original or special?